Author's Commentary

 "I remember one day I decided to host one of the department faculty get-togethers at my home. My husband was completely against the idea because he is very private and did not want to have professional colleagues in our home. He felt our private home should be reserved for family and close friends. Finally, my husband conceded but refused to be present for the event. Despite my inner voice urging me to reconsider, I agreed since I was new to the department and did not want to be perceived as being non-collegial or not being part of the team. The get-together was a personal disaster. While I was in the kitchen, my colleagues took it upon themselves to tour my home and enter my private rooms that were closed at the time. One colleague actually opened my bedroom closet and commented on my taste in clothes. Before the afternoon ended, I was asked and expected to respond to numerous questions, such as: "Did you buy this house or are you renting?"; "What does your husband do for a living?"; "How much did you bedroom set cost, I am thinking about getting one like it?". I expected some minor intrusions into my private life, but never had I thought my new colleagues would be so presumptuous and rude. What made the situation worse was when I got to the university, I heard rumors flying about the visit to my home and how surprised they were that I lived in such a home. Later that semester I was turned down for merit, was mysteriously not given information on a major grant opportunity in my area of expertise, and two of my new grants were refused university funding."

"I was sitting in my office one day correcting papers when a young white woman came looking Dr. Gregory. My name was on the door that was open and I was sitting with my computer turned on. I had just completed a phone call and was putting the receiver down when I turned around and saw her. She looked at me and then at my name-plate on my door and asked me where she could find Dr. Gregory. When I informed her that I was Dr. Gregory she nervously and quickly looked around my office and asked if I would sign a waiver so she could get in my course, which was full. I signed the waiver. During the beginning of the semester, this student addressed me in class only as Mrs. Gregory. I told her in class after the second time that my mother was the only Mrs. Gregory in my family because my husband's last name was not Gregory. After that she decided to call me by my first name, Sheila. After some internal deliberations, I decided that although this was quite annoying it did not warrant any more of my time and effort."

AWL Journal Home Page

AWL Journal Volume 2, Number 1, Winter 1999