By Karin Roest
The standard advice for ambitious women striving to advance in male-dominated fields has often been to suppress their personal and feminine traits to fit a preconceived mold of success. There have been unwritten rules and plenty of women have climbed the corporate ladder by mirroring male behavioral patterns. When women were first entering the workforce and becoming leaders, this was seen as the only way to be taken seriously, however, times have changed, and they have changed for the better. While there are spectrums to all generalizations, studies show that there are significant differences between the way average men and women solve problems and interact with coworkers and clients. And the new trend is that women who are able to differentiate themselves by harnessing their natural abilities are becoming even more successful than they would be if they had changed themselves to fit a mold.
Margaritas and Meditations is a philosophy based on my own extreme personal experiences and backed by scientific studies that prove that the strengths women bring to the workforce need to be valued more or else our entire society will suffer. I was once an orphan, then a jet-setting global Celebrity Talent Scout, a Buddhist Nun, and now a Business & Lifestyle Entrepreneur. Your extremes will not be the same as mine, but you still have them. We each need to be proud of our unconventional backgrounds and stories.
Margaritas stand for the multitasking and diverse sides that women are born with. Women naturally have heightened social skills and are able to use soft communication at a much more nuanced level than their male counterparts. People are noticing and valuing these important attributes across the nation.
On the flip side of the coin, Meditations is the side that is focused and grounded. It is the ability to stand back, analyze the problems that they must solve and create a solid plan for the future. Meditations is your ability to step back from the daily grind to repurpose and channel energy to accomplish specific tasks and to listen to your intuition so that you don’t feel overwhelmed. When they understand how to use that multitasking ability to utilize all of their strengths, measurable success always follows.
These are attributes that have advanced the careers of Grammy-award winning musicians, to highly paid TED Talk presenters, New York Times Best-selling authors, and award-winning philanthropists and journalists that I worked with before. While Meditations and Margaritas helps women understand general traits that females have and should utilize in the workforce, it reaches deeper beyond the fun and catchy titles. At its core are your depth, values, beliefs, purpose, and contribution to humanity. The following are the main tenets of the Meditations and Margaritas approach.
1) Character and Personality
What are your core values, experiences have you had that have made you who you are today, and opposing desires that make you unique? These are the first questions women must ask themselves. You have to look at your life trajectory to understand what shaped you from being average into extraordinary. If you can learn how to use your character and personality to advance your career, all the better! The most successful people show all of their emotions, from tough-minded to introspective and vulnerable because that is what makes people support you because you’re relatable.
2) Diversity
While diversity has been a buzzword for years now, it is increasingly important to harness. This is not about businesses meeting government quotas for women and minorities; it is about using your diversity as an asset in your professional and personal life. For myself, I am an adopted Korean American who didn’t fit in as a child but I became more assertive and strong because of it as an adult. This laid a strong foundation to eloquently manage the ups and downs of being an entrepreneur and how to position myself as an authority to get paid more when I partner with companies. Diversity dives deeper than only ethnicity, contrary to popular belief.
3) Assertiveness
Women are often naturally assertive, but this ability has been suppressed. Those who are less naturally assertive can learn new techniques on how to develop this personality trait and use it to your advantage. Once you identify the characteristics that make you unique and diverse, your confidence grows and you’ll know how to convey yourself with dignity to get the respect that you are worth. When you need to be assertive, standing up for your ideas and opinions that go against the rest of the office help you stand out as a thought leader to your peers.
4) Embracing Femininity
The Meditations and Margaritas philosophy is backed by research from multiple studies that show that instead of trying to downplay the differences between men and women, they are worth examining more closely. These studies show that women are better at a number of things than men, so don’t pressure yourself to change to be more like men. Wear dresses if you want to but if you don’t want to, don’t. Harnessing all of your innate gifts, gives equal importance to the feminine ones and helps you learn how to use them effectively.
5) Multitasking
This is one of the things in which women consistently outperform men. In an increasingly interconnected world, with clients and bosses alike making email or phone requests in real time, job definitions are no longer compact but require multitasking abilities. This trait is essential for modern businesses and a noted trend across the nation that women are developing these skills at a higher capacity than ever before. This is particularly important for the female entrepreneurs and executives I coach. It is a team effort to help even successful women to continually embrace their true ideals in the workplace, so I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to get help from mentors who share the same mindset and goals because it’s tough to do this alone. Nevertheless, progress is happening at record pace and they on their road to mastery. You must be able to work on multiple projects at one time with minimal stress. Life does not get easier, but it’s how you handle it that truly gets you results.
6) Meditation at the workplace
Meditation does not necessarily mean sitting in lotus position with your eyes closed all the time. One of the biggest lessons I learned from meditating for one year in silence is that meditation is a way of life and grace needs to be applied to everything that we do. Successful women focus on how they feel first, then dive into calmly addressing how to complete their tasks. They know or learn how to take time for themselves if they need it. Certainly, that may be difficult when you have a job, family, and other responsibilities, but true Meditation & Margaritas women know they can’t work 24/7. You must be resourceful and take charge to make time for yourself, as no one else is going to do that for you. Men tend to be more aggressively competitive than women but the female way to win is by being trustworthy and building better long-term relationships. Studies show that powerful players, such as investors, prefer to work with women over men exactly for these reasons. Again, in an interconnected and constantly changing world, businesses and organizations look for ways that all parties can rise to a higher level than your competition.
7) Personal Brand
This is where it all comes together. Even if you don’t own your own business, you need to have a personal brand. In fact, you, and your perspectives, purpose, passions, skills, and interests create the foundation for your brand. Then, the next step it so strategically compile the best of each area together and create a product or service that you are passionate about from it. This not only provides extra income, but helps you feel fulfilled and inspired. The result of this is that is creates your legacy, the most notable thing you’ll leave behind that stands the tests of time, long after you pass on from the world. It’s tangible, applicable, and improves other people’s lives. And for this, you must start with being based on you and who you are.
8) Financial Success
Money is not everything, but getting paid as much as your admired role models in the spotlight is one of the most rewarding accomplishments you can achieve. Why? Because you are worth it too. For those in corporate America, assertively proving your worth to your superiors and giving hard facts about the contributions you personally make to the team makes you invaluable. This is worth getting compensated fairly for. Communicating this is a learned skillset, and you can learn it too. gets you the well-deserved promotion and raise. Taking charge of your financial success will get you that well deserved promotion and raise.
10) Your Purpose and Contribution
While Margaritas and Meditations can be focused on career advancement and life in the workplace, it is ultimately holistic. By learning about yourself through your experiences and where you have been and where you want to go, the yin and yang of your purpose and contribution provides a guiding light to stay on track with helping the right people, whether it is customers, colleagues, or raising family. Acknowledgement of the two sides helps you achieve the perfect balance for self-acceptance that modern women are using to reach heights that previous generations could only dream of. We are women. We are all equal. We are all diverse. We can all be successful.
About Karin Roest
Karin Roest is an entrepreneur and female empowerment enthusiast. As a celebrity talent scout & global producer, she has worked with celebrities like Pitbull, Britney Spears and Macklemore. Her diverse connections and cultural experiences has helped guide her to become the entrepreneur she is today.
Courageously confronting the unknown, from sneaking in and out of war zones to rebuild African communities to unraveling the mysterious deaths of her birth parents and three biological sisters, and meditating for one year in silence in Myanmar (Burma), Karin shares her findings about the true meaning of solitude, freedom, happiness, and love to chronicle the lifelong map of her past that has paved the way for the future understanding of herself, the world, and her place within it.