Bringing Our Family to Work

Let's face it, most of us consider professional success and personal success the same.

In other words we become our careers. We also bring our personal and family behaviors to work causing many of the same conflicts we have at home.

The number one skill that will improve both our Ā professional and personal life is good communication. What we have to say is not important unless we are able to be heard.

Following are tips to help build good communication skills:

Listen with an open mind. Concentrate on what the person is saying and the body language used. Put all your energy into thinking this is the most important place to be at this moment and this is the most important person in the world. (The person you are speaking with will feel they are important. This effort will keep the communication positive)

Respond in honest, open, and sincere phrases. Paraphrasing helps the listener understand your thought process and gives you and opportunity to test your own listening skills.

Speak clearly. Ā Keep your voice level, sharp, and clear to make sure you are heard.

Be Proactive. Ā Listen, empathize, give objective feedback. Present a solution to the problem only if it is required of you. Remember communication is not about you it is about them. Ā

Pay Attention to Your body language. How you feel while having this conversation is reflected in your body language. Show your interest by leaning forward when you listen. Don't cross your legs or arms. Don't look detached or uninterested. Eye contact is very important.

Listen and Learn. When you listen you are learning how people feel, how they express themselves. Once you learn how that person thinks and feels, you are better able to communicate with them.

"There is more than a verbal tie between the words common, community, and communication.... Try the experiment of communicating, with fullness and accuracy, some experience to another, especially if it be somewhat complicated, and you will find your own attitude toward your experience changing." John Dewey

http://www.sidebysidecoach.com/BusinessCoach.html

Sharon S. Stephens, MHSA, author "Daily Stepping Stones," "Late Bloomer," certified Retirement Success Planner, Telephone Coach,Sex Counselor, Small Business Administration Counselor, Teleleader, Continuing Education Trainer,Quality Management Certification. Life Coach--Side By Side Coach. http://www.sidebysidecoach.com

RELATED ARTICLES

15 Tips for Writing Winning Resumes
The thought of writing a resume intimidates almost anyone.Ā It's difficult to know where to start or what to include.Ā It can seem like an insurmountable task.Ā Here are 15 tips to help you not only tackle the task, but also write a winning resume.Ā 1. Determine your job search objective prior to writing the resume.Ā Once you have determined your objective, you can structure the content of your resume around that objective.Ā Think of your objective as the bull's-eye to focus your resume on hitting.Ā If you write your resume without having a clear objective in mind, it will likely come across as unfocused to those that read it.Ā Take the time before you start your resume to form a clear objective.Ā Ā Ā 2. Think of your resume as a marketing tool.Ā Think of yourself as a product, potential employers as your customers, and your resume as a brochure about you.Ā Market yourself through your resume.Ā What are your features and benefits?Ā What makes you unique?Ā Make sure to convey this information in your resume. Ā 3. Use your resume to obtain an interview, not a job.Ā You don't need to go into detail about every accomplishment.Ā Strive to be clear and concise.Ā The purpose of your resume is to generate enough interest in you to have an employer contact you for an interview.Ā Use the interview to provide a more detailed explanation of your accomplishments and to land a job offer.Ā 4. Use bulleted sentences.Ā In the body of your resume, use bullets with short sentences rather than lengthy paragraphs.Ā Resumes are read quickly.Ā This bulleted sentence format makes it easier for someone to quickly scan your resume and still absorb it.Ā 5. Use action words.Ā Action words cause your resume to pop.Ā To add life to your resume, use bulleted sentences that begin with action words like prepared, developed, monitored, and presented.Ā Ā Ā 6. Use #'s, $'s and %'s.Ā Numbers, dollars, and percentages stand out in the body of a resume.Ā Use them.Ā Here are two examples: Managed a department of 10 with a budget of $1,000,000.Increased sales by 25% in a 15-state territory. 7. Lead with your strengths.Ā Since resumes are typically reviewed in 30 seconds, take the time to determine which bullets most strongly support your job search objective.Ā Put those strong points first where they are more apt to be read.Ā 8. Play Match Game.Ā Review want ads for positions that interest you.Ā Use the key words listed in these ads to match them to bullets in your resume.Ā If you have missed any key words, add them to your resume.Ā 9. Use buzzwords.Ā If there are terms that show your competence in a particular field, use them in your resume.Ā For marketing people, use "competitive analysis."Ā For accounting types, use "reconciled accounts."Ā Ā 10. Accent the positive.Ā Leave off negatives and irrelevant points.Ā If you feel your date of graduation will subject you to age discrimination, leave the date off your resume.Ā If you do some duties in your current job that don't support your job search objective, leave them off your resume.Ā Focus on the duties that do support your objective.Ā Leave off irrelevant personal information like your height and weight.Ā 11. Show what you know.Ā Rather than going into depth in one area, use your resume to highlight your breadth of knowledge.Ā Use an interview to provide more detail.Ā Ā Ā 12. Show who you know.Ā If you have reported to someone important such as a vice president or department manager, say so in your resume.Ā Having reported to someone important causes the reader to infer that you are important.Ā 13. Construct your resume to read easily.Ā Ā Leave white space.Ā Use a font size no smaller than 10 point.Ā Limit the length of your resume to 1-2 pages.Ā Remember, resumes are reviewed quickly.Ā Help the reader to scan your resume efficiently and effectively. Ā 14. Have someone else review your resume.Ā Since you are so close to your situation, it can be difficult for you to hit all your high points and clearly convey all your accomplishments. Ā Have someone review your job search objective, your resume, and listings of positions that interest you.Ā Encourage them to ask questions.Ā Their questions can help you to discover items you inadvertently left off your resume.Ā Revise your resume to include these items.Ā Their questions can also point to items on your resume that are confusing to the reader.Ā Clarify your resume based on this input. Ā 15. Submit your resume to potential employers.Ā Have the courage to submit your resume.Ā Think of it as a game where your odds of winning increase with every resume you submit.Ā You really do increase your odds with every resume you submit.Ā Use a three-tiered approach.Ā Apply for some jobs that appear to be beneath you.Ā Perhaps they will turn out to be more than they appeared to be once you interview for them.Ā Or perhaps once you have your foot in the door you can learn of other opportunities.Ā Apply for jobs that seem to be just at your level.Ā You will get interviews for some of those jobs.Ā See how each job stacks up.Ā Try for some jobs that seem like a stretch.Ā That's how you grow -- by taking risks.Ā Don't rule yourself out.Ā Trust the process.Ā Good luck in your job search!Ā Ā Copyright 1999 - 2004Ā Quest Career Services, LLC.Ā All Rights Reserved.

Career Discovery - Pinpoint Your Ideal Career
Determine your ideal career--one that's in alignment withyour values, passions, and talents--and discover the workyou were born to do

How to Walk Away from an Opportunity thats Wrong for You
Q. I just finished a job interview. Everything went well. But I can't get excited about the job. The people were nice but frankly, I got bored.

Tips on How to Write High Impact Letters of Recommendation
Congratulations. You've been asked to write a letter ofrecommendation for an employee or colleague. This person valuesyour opinion of him or her, and you'd be glad to help themadvance. The problem is you're unsure of what to say or how tosay it! Here are four tips to keep in mind when preparing yourrecommendation.

When Should You Update Your Job Skills?
With the U.S. economy still slumping and unemployment numbers barely moving forward, many workers may be considering what their employment future could be like if they were to lose their job. If you're in a healthcare field, or possess computer skills, you don't have much to worry about, except explaining why you left your last job. On the other hand, if you're employed in production or manufacturing, you may be asking yourself, "when should I update my job skills?"

Diplomats and Spies
"The Baratarian pirates also offered their services. Even though an American naval force had destroyed their base on Grand Terre Island in September, the Baratarians rejected British overtures to side with them. (6) {Other accounts make it clear the men were willing to go it alone or against the Americans and yet Lafitte convinced them to support the American cause. I see this as part of the French Masonic or Merovingian/Priory plan that included Napoleon. Lafitte and Joseph Napoleon later tried to break Napoleon out of St. Helena. I think Lafitte was their agent and played any role or side to support their cause first and foremost. They wanted the US to become a real force in the world. Their counterparts in England had declared French Masonry was without a soul. They had formally declared them to be any number of silly things. It continues to some extent to the present. I shall address this more as I proceed but suffice it to say that at some level we have an inner sanctum of people who are playing both sides for fools.} Instead they pleaded with American officials to accept their services. According to one observer, 'this transition from piracy to Patriotism' was due to the influence of Edward Livingston. The pirates had promised Livingston $20,000 if he could secure their acquittal on charges of violating the trade laws,?" (7)

What Every Employee Should Know About How to Overcome Boredom
Do you find yourself easily becoming bored or tired at work for no apparent reason? If that's the case, then pay close attention. Research has shown that fatigue and a worn-out feeling are often caused by unproductive mental attitudes. If this describes your case, read on to learn six ways you can overcome boredom.

12 Steps to Targeting Success in Your Career or Job Search
Is your job search sagging? Are you still looking for that ideal next job? Or are you about to begin looking for new work and are not sure of the best way to go about it? What you need is a way to evaluate your job search strategies to see whether or not they are working effectively for you.

What is Mystery Shopping, and Can You Really Get Paid to Shop?
Mystery shoppers visit businesses "disguised as normal customers," and do the things other customers do-ask questions, make a purchase, make a return-but with a twist. These undercover customers are there to evaluate the businesses and their employees. After a visit, the mystery shopper completes a report or questionnaire detailing what occurred.

Mastering The Lunch Interview
Interviews can be nerve-racking, brain-draining, headache-inducingexperiences. These days, recruiters have found a way to make theinterview even more difficult by combining the experience with ameal. This means that in addition to listening to the interviewer,formulating intelligent responses, and trying your hardest to beconfident, you now have pay attention to how you look while eating.

Behaviour To Climb The Stepping Stones To Career Success
The heading of this article could just as well have been "How to position yourself for promotion" or "How to position yourself for career advancement" or "How to climb the success ladder" or something similar.

A Cover Letter Tip Guaranteed To Land You More Job Interviews!
Looking for a new job?

Creating Traffic Jams
It's hard to imagine why anyone would pick up a newspaper to find a job any more. With a seemingly endless array of career sites, mailing lists, corporate sites and newsgroups, job seekers have more options online than ever before. And the credit goes to the growth and advances in Information Technology (IT).

From Cleaning Lady to Entrepreneur: How Your Cleaning Business can Benefit from the Images
Many people never consider entering the cleaning business because of the images it has.

The Chicken or the Egg?
Even before I checked my calendar on Monday morning, I knew the appointment would be there. Passed over for promotion again, Ralph wanted specifics on why I hadn't chosen him for the position. This was not a new conversation. I thought of Ralph as my chicken and egg dilemma. Ralph was the chicken. He believed he would make a great Team Leader, and when I promoted him, he would step up and show me how well he could lead. My position was that of egg. Prove to me you have leadership skills by demonstrating leadership in the job you have now, and I'll consider giving you the next position.Ā Here's the question: is it better to do the work, knowing you will ultimately be rewarded for having done it, or should you wait until the reward is there before you do the work? Like the proverbial question of which came first, the chicken or the egg, people differ widely on the answer and run their careers accordingly.Ā Here's the way I see it - one has more to lose by taking the position of the chicken and waiting for someone else to anoint them, than by being the egg and anointing oneself. If I had waited to be a leader until someone offered me a leadership position, I might still be wishing and hoping for someone to notice me. When I wanted to be a manager, I did the work of a manager by taking on more and more responsibilities. And, I got promoted. When I wanted to be a director, I did the work of a director, without questioning compensation or title. After proving myself, I got the job, the title and the compensation. Same with being a vice-president. Doing the job first, gave me the job.Ā It's the same now that I'm out of the corporate arena. Take my dream of being a writer. Changing careers after twenty-something years in management, I could have waited to write a column until I secured a writing contract for one. But, why would someone pay me to write without reading my words and knowing I can. Chicken and egg again.Ā What works for me has been consistent. When I do the work first, the rewards follow. I think of it like exercising. Doing it gives me better results than thinking about it. No one likes to be called a chicken, so ... be the egg.Ā (c) 2004 Nan S. Russell.Ā All rights reserved.

Using Your Whine Factor
Brian's work was exceptional. Still, as his boss, I rarely offered him additional responsibilities, never thought of promoting him or selecting him for a critical project. Why? His whine factor got in the way. Ā He was quick to complain to anyone who'd listen how much work was on his plate, or how hard or how late he worked. His whine factor was a protective shield that insured he didn't get more work to do. But, it also shielded him from getting the opportunity filled assignments, more interesting work, and the highest pay raises.Ā Stephanie was a different story. She was masterful at weaving vivid details with a precision that explained exactly why the expected outcome didn't happen. This week it centered on a miscommunication, last week it was the delayed delivery, or the reduced advertising, an incompetent supplier or a staff illness. Every story was accurate; every reason plausible; every explanation justifiable; always a good reason why she couldn't deliver the promised quality, precision or timeliness.Ā As her boss, it took me time to realize that Stephanie's accountability decreased each time her whine factor increased. As she became more entrenched in offering reasons why something didn't happen, she became less personally involved in the actual results.Ā I've seen the whine factor derail projects and people in my twenty years in management. Whining shifts a mindset from can do to can't do, allows potholes to become sink holes, turns challenges to complaints and reframes opportunities into woe is me.Ā You can use your own whine factor as a barometer to keep you on track. If the factor is high, be alerted that your actions are, most likely, becoming less accountable. That should signal you to tune into what you can personally do to control, adjust or correct the current course so you can deliver the expected results. I think that point is worth repeating because it differentiates performance in significant ways. If you want to control the outcome, you'll need to get your hands a bit calloused along the way.Ā Learning to listen to your whine factor is a helpful self-feedback mechanism to guide you towards greater accountability and winning at working behaviors. Less whine means more accountability. Higher accountability typically means better results. And better results are what most of us are after.Ā (c) 2004 Nan S. Russell.Ā All rights reserved.

Resume That Effectively Promotes You!
Imagine for a moment that you have created a wonderful product. You are excited at the possibilities of attaining name, fame and wealth marketing this product. You create a business plan and a marketing plan. You plan an excellent packaging and a presentation that would do justice to the benefits the product offers to the world and you get all set to market it.

Stripper--Turned--Waitress Cant Leave Former Job Behind
She stretches in the break room for 30 minutes before each shift. She glides around the dining room like silk wafting on the breeze. She's been known to strip off her shirt and bra to combat the heat in the kitchen.

Job Interviews -- The Four Worst Objections You?ll Face and How to Deal with Them
Dealing with tough questions and objections is an essential part of job interviews. Here are four common ones that derail many candidates. Read on to find out what they are and how you can deal with them.

The 7 Tough Job Interview Questions That Can Make or Break You - and How to Answer Them
Some interview questions are asked so frequently that they've become classics. Practically every interview you go on you'll be answering one or more of these seven interview questions.

Home |Site Map